I look an enneagram test and these were my results:
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1 |
2 |
3 |
4 |
5 |
6 |
7 |
8 |
9 |
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3 |
5 |
6 |
7 |
4 |
3 |
4 |
1 |
3 |
The enneagram numbers are across the top column, from type 1 to 9. The numbers beneath were my scores based on the survey I filled out.
My top numbers:
Type 4: The Artist: Intuitive and Reserved (*my highest score)
Type 3: The Motivator: Adaptable and Success-oriented
Type 2: The Helper: Caring and Nurturing
The Romantic (Enneagram Type Four)
Romantics have sensitive feelings and are warm and perceptive.
How to Get Along with Me:
- Give me plenty of compliments. They mean a lot to me.
- Be a supportive friend or partner. Help me to learn to love and value myself.
- Respect me for my special gifts of intuition and vision.
- Though I don’t always want to be cheered up when I’m feeling melancholy, I sometimes like to have someone lighten me up a little.
- Don’t tell me I’m too sensitive or that I’m overreacting
What I Like About Being a Four:
- my ability to find meaning in life and to experience feeling at a deep level
- my ability to establish warm connections with people
- admiring what is noble, truthful, and beautiful in life
- my creativity, intuition, and sense of humor
- being unique and being seen as unique by others
- having aesthetic sensibilities
- being able to easily pick up the feelings of people around me
What’s Hard About Being a Four:
- experiencing dark moods of emptiness and despair
- feelings of self-hatred and shame; believing I don’t deserve to be loved
- feeling guilty when I disappoint people
- feeling hurt or attacked when someone misundertands me
- expecting too much from myself and life
- fearing being abandoned
- obsessing over resentments
- longing for what I don’t have
Fours as Children Often:
- have active imaginations: play creatively alone or organize playmates in original games
- are very sensitive
- feel that they don’t fit in
- believe they are missing something that other people have
- attach themselves to idealized teachers, heroes, artists, etc.
- become anti-authoritarian or rebellious when criticized or not understood
- feel lonely or abandoned (perhaps as a result of a death or their parents’ divorce)
Fours as Parents:
- help their children become who they really are
- support their children’s creativity and originality
- are good at helping their children get in touch with their feelings
- are sometimes overly critical or overly protective
- are usually very good with children if not too self-absorbed
To take an enneagram test or to read the descriptions, check out: 9types
Oh man, where do I even start. This is totally me.
For acquaintances and friends on Instagram, you see my creative side, my aesthetic, and how I care about people. What few see, except for my husband, is what’s hard about being me.
I have feelings of self-hatred, often. I feel disgusting in my own skin (harsh, but true). I’m double the size of what I used to be. I ate the old Lainie. I often feel like I’m not doing enough for those around me. I should be a better mom. a better wife. a better friend. a better daughter. I expect waaaay too much from myself and life.
I long for things all the time. I worry about being misunderstood and overly censor myself to the point where others don’t always get to see the real me. I feel dark moods of emptiness and question whether I matter. I think that’s why Imperfect Boss Camp shook me like it did.
Picture a group of creative women sitting in a camp hall during a keynote speaker. The speaker says, You are enough. You matter. And Lainie is sitting there on the verge of tears because it hit a little too close to home. Because I don’t often feel that I’m enough and I don’t even know when that started.
Now I want to go back through my enneagram results and come up with a plan (which is so me. I need to take action. Information is nice to know but a person needs to do something with it.)
I want to share my How to Get Along with Me info with my husband, even though the guy has known me for over 20+ years (he knows me better than I know myself sometimes). In sharing it, I hope to better communicate what I need. And with What’s Hard About Being a Four, I need to think about what I can do to support myself during those times.
Whether quizzes are seen as silly or not, if it makes me reflect on my behaviour and who I am, it’s well worth my time.
If you have kids and they’re old enough, it might be interesting to have them do an enneagram quiz. I wrote a post that shares some links if you’re interested. Or you could read the descriptions of each number with your kids in mind.
In reading the description for Enneagram Four, I worry about Thatcher. I think he’s a four too. He’s such a sensitive soul who laughs in our faces when getting into trouble (total anti-authoritarian). We will need to keep an eye on him and love on him big time. Being a four is hard.
There’s also an interesting section about marriages and enneagram numbers. Look out, Eric Holmes, I see you being subjected to an enneagram test in your near future 🙂
